Inspector Gadget Theme

Hmmmm...I'm thinking Bill at the next Providence Talent Show.

Fall! Leaves, Apples, and Gourds

Some great sites for Fall:

Remember that old song?

The falling leaves...

drift by my window...

I feel a craft project coming on...

so I must go...

...or something like that. I know the first two lines are right. Here's a project for you if you just don't know what to do with all those pretty maple leaves that will be falling soon:

How to make roses from maple leaves

...and if you are like me and don't know a maple leaf from a ginko, here's a nice leaf identification guide from the Missouri Botanical Garden:

Autumn Leaf Scrapbook

Mmmmmm...apples. Beautiful pictures of a number of varieties at:
Apple Journal: Photo Gallery

Gourds: In my spare time I would love to learn how to do this:

Marilyn Sunderland Studio

Aren't those beautiful?

Interview with Michael Snyder, Part Two

As promised, here's part two. Read to the end to find out how to enter for a chance to win a signed copy of Return Policy.

RH: You’re sitting in Starbucks and three authors walk in and ask to share your table. They are:

MS: -Hmmm, I’m tempted to say Grisham or King, so we could get all the refills we want. But I think I’m going to go with Hornby, Russo, and Coupland. When we ran out of writerly things to talk about, we could have an arm wrestling contest.

RH: A character in your book is serving raccoon at a candlelit dinner. Red or white wine? Side dishes? Condiments? Background music?

MS:-I’m really glad you went with raccoon as opposed to inebriated basset hound or badger! So I’m thinking red Kool-Aid, white vinegar, with a side dish of a large takeout pizza. The condiments would have to include dental floss for sure. The background music would obviously be the theme song to the old Daniel Boone series.

(This photo has absolutely nothing to do with the interview, but I just find that pictures heighten interest, don't you agree?)

RH: Any new titles/projects that you are currently working on that you can tell us about?

MS:-My current novel-in-progress is called A Stand-Up Guy. It attempts to answer the question, “What if a stand-up comic resolved to only tell the truth in his act, no matter who gets hurt?”

I’ve also described it this way… “A classic tale of girl meets boy, boy catches girl stealing.”

The story’s really not as funny as I’m making it sound. It should have plenty of jokes and humorous observations, but hopefully will have a pretty big heart beating inside between the pages as well. (And maybe even a few more mixed metaphors like the one I just doled out there…)

RH: What is a word or phrase that you need to be careful to not overuse in your books?

MS: -It really changes with every book. I know in the first draft of Russell Fink it seemed like every character grinned and nodded a lot. So it was like I was writing about a cast of maniacal bobble-head dolls.

And my wife is always catching me misspelling the word “from.” I spell it f-o-r-m, which obviously changes the meaning quite a bit.

RH: Do you listen to music as you write? If so, whose music brings out the best in you?

MS: -Absolutely! When I first started writing, I could only listen to a handful of albums—namely, Jonatha Brooke’s early stuff, Miles Davis’ Ballads & Blues, and a couple of Keith Jarrett solo piano things.

Thankfully, my muse has grown more agreeable and I can listen to pretty much anything I like now. For some reason lately, I’ve been on a Wilco kick. Ryan Adams is getting a lot of play as well. And a newish band called Roman Candle.

RH: Is there something that you wish an interviewer would ask you but never does? Feel free to ask and answer it here.

MS:-“How can you be so incredibly rich AND good-looking?”

Frankly, I’m a little bummed (not to mention surprised!) that you didn’t ask. I’ve read and reread these questions numerous times and still can’t find it. I’m trying to forgive you.

RH: Have you ever won a prize in a contest?

MS: -I suppose you mean writing contests. Obviously, I’d prefer not go into detail on my long and storied legacy as a body-builder, a cake decorator, a moose hunter, and the world’s-fastest-nail-clipper.

A few years ago a short story of mine was named the editor’s choice in a literary journal called Relief. Also, My Name Is Russell Fink was nominated for the Book of the Year (2009) by Christianity Today—Marilyn Robinson actually won the award. Can you believe she beat me?

RH: Please direct us to your blog/website. Can you direct us to any websites where we can read some of your short stories/writings?

MS: - www.michaelsnyderwrites.com

I have just paid someone to update my website and blog. So hopefully I’ll be adding content worth reading in the very near future!

And of course, I’m noodling around with some regularity on Facebook and Twitter.

RH: Do you need another dog?

MS:-Only if it promises to either a) educate, or b) quietly dispose of, my current dog.

RH: What are you thinking right now?

MS:-“I wonder if Rhonda remembers she owes me ten bucks…”

Ahem...at this point I abruptly ended the interview. I could tell you that Michael left me with these words: "Rhonda, you ask amazing cool questions. And you’re one of the best aunts in the business." Yes, I could mention that but it would be self-serving, so I won't.

Interview with Michael Snyder, Author of Return Policy

---Today I am posting the first half of an interview that I conducted with Michael Snyder, whose second novel, Return Policy, was released a few months ago. I've written about Michael in a previous post.

RH: Let’s start with the most important question first: At what point after you married my lovely niece, Alicia, did you realize the incredible bonus of having me as your aunt? Describe your feelings in as many words needed. Take your time...no rush...

MS:-Oh, I realized the benefits immediately, if not before.

The actual sensation is difficult to describe, but not terribly unlike an early onset bout of the giggles, followed close behind with that funny bone feeling that began in my toenails and swirled upward until my spine was practically dancing with joy (or possibly shimmying…a close call), ending with euphoric hangover that included (but was in no way limited to) whooping cough, slight gas pains, and a small patch of acne behind my left knee.

But I’m sure you get that answer all the time.

RH: Return Policy is your second novel, following the equally enjoyable My Name is Russell Fink. How did you grow as a writer from one to the next?

MS: -Definitely not taller.

I think more than anything it’s getting a little easier to discern what to leave out of my stories. There are a lot of details and anecdotes that an author needs to know that don’t necessarily need to make it onto the page. This is especially true with character-driven stories (as opposed to plot-driven).

I heard a great musician comment once that he liked to think of the notes he played as stepping-stones to the next silence. Sometimes, what’s implied is as powerful as what makes it into print. So it’s difficult sometimes to leave things out, to “kill my darlings.” But if it makes the book better, it must be done.

RH: The three main characters in Return Policy are Willy, Ozena and Shaq. The story alternates between these characters, all speaking in the first person. What do you do to make sure that their voices are distinct one from the other?

MS: -That’s a great question. And I just hope, on some level, that I actually did make their voices unique. There are lots of ways to accomplish this, some more subtle than others. It really has to do with knowing your characters well...and frankly, loving them well.

The real difficulty in this book was Shaq. He was an educated homeless man. He’s also a bit delusional. So saddling him with specific speech patterns or jargon was all but impossible. It was very important for Shaq to feel credible, no matter who he was talking to. As such, his speech patterns tended to change based on the conversation he was having at the time.

For Willy and Ozena, I just had to spend time getting to know them. Then it’s just a matter of staying true to their character.

RH: It is evident in your writing that you are one funny guy. How do you come up with those witty descriptions and scenarios?

MS: -Wow, thanks! And I don’t really have a very good answer for this question. I’m just glad you asked it. So I’m providing this non-answer to ensure that the question stays in the interview!

RH: What is your process when you begin to write a book?

MS: -Procrastinate, panic, pray, repeat. Eventually I sit down and actually start typing. Then back to my three P’s above.

I’m not much of a plotter, more of a seat-of-the-pants writer. In fact, my favorite part of the process is the actual composing. I love it when something completely unplanned and/or unscripted comes flying into my brain and out of my fingers onto the page.

It’s been said that good story endings need to feel both surprising and inevitable. When the writing is going well, it all feels like that, not just the ending.

The first order of business is getting to know the characters. If there’s a reliable or consistent way to do this however, I haven’t figured it out yet. Eventually, if I plant my butt in the chair and keep typing, it all works out.

RH: Describe your workspace to us.

MS: -I wrote My Name Is Russell Fink in the bonus room or our first house. I started it on a clunky PC and finished it on a sleek Mac laptop. (And yes, that makes me a Mac snob!)

Return Policy was written at our dining room table, which just happened to be parked for nineteen months at my brother/sister-in-law’s house.

Now, I write tucked away in an odd rectangle just off the rec room in our new house. I did eventually wear the old Mac out and have “new” one. Most nights I sit on a rickety office chair, bellied up to Alicia’s grandfather’s old desk.

Sometimes, just for the sake of variety, I will rearrange all the clutter.

RH: What were your favorite picture books as a child? What are your children’s favorite picture books?

MS: -Are You My Mother?

Legend has it, that I used to read this book upside down. RH: (Why am I not surprised?)

As for my kids, they LOVE books. And we have tons of them. I really don’t know if they have favorites, per se. But they too love the Dr. Seuss books, as well as Silverstein and Milne. And I’m not sure these qualify as picture books, but we’re all huge fans of Patricia Polacco books.

RH: What books or authors influenced you most as a writer?

MS: -The easy (and true) answer is: Every writer I’ve ever read.

Specifically though, I credit Richard Russo’s Straight Man as the book that finally convinced me to try my hand at writing. I’m a pretty big fan of Nick Hornby, Douglas Coupland, Flannery O’Connor, John Irving, and Lorrie Moore as well.

RH: What is one thing most people don’t know about you?

MS: -To quote one of my least favorite songwriters ever: “I’m a sexy man trapped in an ugly man’s body.”

---Well, that's it for now. I'll post Part 2 tomorrow...or the next day...or the day after that. There will be a give-away, too. And no, it's not a pair of goofy glasses.

David Scofield Hoard

October 13, 1970 - August 31, 1999

It seems like yesterday

It seems like forever

Psalm 116:15

Precious in the sight of the Lord is the death of His saints.

Meet Michael Snyder: Talented Author, Funny Guy, International Olive-Pitting Champion, and oh yes, My Nephew

...well, most everything in the title above is true.

Yes, we have a published author in my family. Michael is married to Alicia, the oldest of my six favorite nieces, and he doesn't know it, but I liked him before I ever met him. Fran and I happened to visit Alicia right after she started dating Michael and I could tell by the look on her face when she talked about him that he was someone very special.

Shortly after he became part of our family, he gave Ellen, the youngest of my six favorite nieces, a drawing, that if we had thought about it, would have been a tip-off of things to come. Somehow, this little 3/4 inch X 1 1/2 inch drawing came into my mother's possession, and I am able to show it to you here because my mother doesn’t throw anything away. Case in point: she still has taped on an index card half of a sewing needle that came out of my foot years after it went in. But, enough about me. Back to Michael’s drawing.

At first glance, you might think that the little man is holding a piece of paper behind his back. No. That white box is actually a cut-out, which is very important because, you see, if you take your index finger and bend it down at the second knuckle and strategically place it behind the picture, it will appear that the little man's little draaars have fallen down to reveal the little man's little bottom. (Now you can see how the addition of Michael to our family gave us the sophistication we so desperately craved.)

So, fourteen years and four children later, when he is not working his regular job, being a devoted family man and fixing things around the house, Michael writes (and drinks a lot of coffee).

His second book, Return Policy, published by Zondervan, was just released a couple months ago. I really liked his first book, My Name is Russell Fink, but I really, really enjoyed this new one. Michael's writing is wonderfully funny and I find myself resisting the urge to highlight some of his observations, memorize them and then drop these witticisms into conversation at appropriate times to impress friends and acquaintances.

















"Once a year my senile aunt tries to kill me." - That's how Return Policy begins. Over the course of the novel we are introduced to three main characters, Willy, Ozena, and Shah, whose narratives and complicated lives intertwine before too long. I won't tell you much more except to say that early in the story we find Willy trying every which way (and without success) to destroy his espresso machine.

I have to admit, I don't read a lot of Christian fiction, mainly because I find much of it predictable and preachy. But Michael's writing is edgy, and filled with humor and compassion. He tackles tough issues and causes me to examine my own life and charity toward others. I would classify the genre as contemporarily quirky, or quirkily contemporary. Hey, Michael, if you are reading this, what do you think?

At Amazon you can read some great reviews by folks who do a much better job expressing my sentiments about Michael's writing.

In a few days I will post an interview with Michael that I think you will enjoy. Perhaps you would like to know that I will be giving a signed copy of Return Policy to one lucky person. But more about that next time. Thanks for stopping by!

School School School School School

...and more school. I'll feel much better in a few weeks. Everything seems to change from school year to school year: schedules, staff, procedures. Handling change well...not one of my gifts.

Save the World, er, I mean...Save the Words!

This is a screen shot of the home page of the Save the Words website. Here you will find a collage of various obscure words. Visiting this wall of words and having them call out to you ("pick me" or "yo, over here") is reminiscent of going to the Human Society, but without the guilt and emotional angst. There's that, and in addition, if you adopt a word you won't have to feed it or take it out for a walk, or have someone (Lori) callously suggest that you shoot it.

If you move your mouse outside of the white frame the words scroll from side to side or top to bottom. The idea is that these words are not used often enough and they are in danger of becoming extinct. You are called upon to step up, get involved and adopt one of these words.

In adopting you agree to this pledge: "I hereby promise to use this word in conversation and correspondence, as frequently as possible to the best of my ability."

So I ambitiously adopted two words today. I will use them in a sentence right now: Having been a foppotee for as long as I can remember, I am murklins as to what I should say next. Bet you can't guess the words I adopted. If you can, then you are not as much of a foppotee as I thought.

So what are you waiting for? There are lots of words that need a-savin'. Adopt one today! Use it in a sentence here, and then go out and share it with the world. You will feel so much better.

I'm Learning to Knit!

It's true! This is only something that I've wanted to do for forty years. I come from a family of crocheters (crochettes? -- crochetians? -- crochetarians? -- crochetsters?) so I've known how to crochet since I was young, but it seems that when I look at patterns, the ones I gravitate toward involve knitting. So I got Knitting for Dummies and a how-to video from the library, some knitting needles and yarn and I'm on my way. It really isn't as difficult as I thought it would be.

So, now that I am picking up a little speed, I thought this would be a good time to tell you that whatever gift you get from me in the next few years will probably be something knitted. In fact I'm working on Christmas gifts for some of you now. Here are a few photos of what I hope will be finished in time to bless you with a little special handmade something. You'll notice these are mainly hats or legwarms, the easier stuff, because, well, I'm still learning.

Expect more ambitious gifts next year: jumpsuits, ponchos, sweatercoats, things like that. See if you can guess which one is yours.

This might be a good time to disown me as a friend, forget my blog address and block my emails. Don't say you weren't warned.

Gratitude

Next Wednesday I will report back to school after a ten-week summer break. Each year at this time I start grumbling about having to return. My job is great, I love being around the kids, the staff is wonderful, and school is two miles from my house. It's just hard to give up the freedom. So I decided this year I need an attitude adjustment. When I start hearing that grumbling going on in my head or spilling out through my mouth, I am trying to remind myself of all God's blessings. So, if you hear me complaining about going back to work, you have my permission to wag your finger at me and give me your best scowl. That should make me feel guilty.

Psalm 100

Make a joyful noise to the Lord, all the earth!

Serve the Lord with gladness!

Come into his presence with singing!

Know that the Lord, he is God!

It is he who made us, and we are his;

we are his people, and the sheep of his pasture.

Enter his gates with thanksgiving,

and his courts with praise!

Give thanks to him; bless his name!

For the Lord is good,

his steadfast love endures forever,

and his faithfulness to all generations.